23 June 2014

Hope deferred...

Sometimes you don't realise how much you're looking forward to something until it doesn't happen.

Today I was supposed to have an assessment by an OT (Occupational Therapist) for, among other things, a stairlift. I knew I was excited - being able to go downstairs occasionally would be amazing - but I've been trying to accept my situation and convince myself that really I'm ok about not having been downstairs for months. And I was trying to downplay the stairlift assessment in my head, to not get too excited, not build my hopes up, not 'count my chickens', in case they said "no".

Turns out, I wasn't as successful as I thought.

A colleague of the OT called this morning to cancel the appointment as the OT is off sick. And I'm absolutely gutted.

We're trying to rearrange it, although it's a little tricky as I am not awake or alert for much of the day, and need to keep my rest times sacrosanct otherwise things quickly go very pear shaped, so trying to fit an appointment around my schedule is tricky enough without also trying to fit in with both the OT and my husband's work schedule! We'll get there though, and I know the assessment will happen sometime in the next week or so, and I've been waiting many months already so a week is really not that big of a deal, but still....

I'm just gutted. Can't think of any other word.


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